Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Randomize
