I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
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Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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