i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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