epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I'm bleeding and have questions
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
