a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Randomize
