If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
