you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
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