She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
worst night to have a conscience
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
