Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
