whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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