Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
