If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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