She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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