Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
i will never coherently bang her
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize