On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
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