I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
