I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize
