I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize
