My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
