do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
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