Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Randomize
