yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
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