Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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