shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
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We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
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I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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