It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
