Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
