I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
