Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...