Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
In America we eat man semen.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Randomize
