It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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