I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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