So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Randomize
