I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
