Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
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