i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize