my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
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