I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
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Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
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As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher