don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
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