watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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