just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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