I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
