I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
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