clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
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