So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
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