stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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