Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
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my cup is half full, half full of rum.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
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