I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
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