Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
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I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
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Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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