I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
