at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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